Monday, October 02, 2006


Found this today.....

It sums things up right now.

We do at least have a strategy. She's hoping to be here in a year's time - for good. At that point we have to decide whether we want to enter a Civil Partnership straight away or whether we want to apply for her to stay as an Unmarried Partner but the rules are complex and ambiguous. We're trying to work our way through them to get some semblance of what is necessary. In the meantime though she's working hard and saving, and also has started the process of looking for work over here. If she can get a job now then she can come over on a working visa, which would make things so much easier. Otherwise she can't work for 6 months when she does get here. It's all so complex. I threw up some links over there about the whole scenario, but if anyone knows of anywhere else where we can get advice or information then we would both be very grateful.

I miss her.


Blogger The Mad Hatter said...

Hey chick,
I've just stopped kicking myself in the arse for not finding you sooner. Im sorry, sometimes we get stuck in our own little world and round our usual friends, that sometimes we dont bother to look outside the bubble.

Reading you words, its like I wrote them, my other half and I went and will be going through the same thing. She's turkish and Im irish but raised in London.

Fairy and I were separated for bout 6 months, if not longer cos she was here on and au-par's visa and had to return to turkey after a year and a half of being here, of being with me. It was the worst time of our lives, so I feel where your coming from. During that time apart we argued everyday, I crashed my motorbike, which led to me being in hospital for a while with bad injuries and along with all that, my ma was slowly dying from cancer. The time I despartaly needed my love around, the frigging goverment wouldnt renew her visa to come back to me. Fuckers!

Anyway, to make a long story short, she got back on a tourist visa then when she came we tried to figure out a way for her to stay so we came up with the plan of opening our own business,it seemed to work for everyone else, along we went to aply for a business visa. She didnt get it, it took 2 and a half years and plus we had to go to court to appeal the 'home office's' dicission, but it payed off, the judge gave it to us. All this just to stay in this country, but all this was worth it for love :-)

Next year we'll marry :-)

But... we have to go through the same thing all over again !!!!!

Good luck chick, really, you will make it, there'll be alot of tears and heart ache along with the ride, but you'll get there, trust me, Im an expert ;-)

Take care of yourself X

1:08 PM  
Blogger The Mad Hatter said...

I came back for the song, I love it, one of my favs, and who'd beleive this guy was on 'fame academy', and got kick out cos they said he wouldnt get anywhere!

1:12 PM  
Blogger lecram sinun said...

You two have gotten this far. I'm sure it will all work out. :)

3:56 PM  
Blogger Miladysa said...

Fingers crossed for the job hunting!

It will all work out OK - just you wait and see :]

9:36 PM  
Blogger Evil Minx said...

Where there's a will, there's a way. ANd kudos to you both for going through the hideously bureaucratic combination of red tape and bullshit required to do it all legally. This will shorten the wait in the end, frustrating though it is.

But as everyone else has said -- you will get there. I know it, they know it, and so do you. And S.


11:52 AM  
Blogger Lyle said...

What does ~S~ do?

I would normally recommend JobServe for looking for work, particularly if she's IT-based. I'm not sure whether they deal a lot with applicants from the US, but I've found all my contracting jobs through the agencies involved in Jobserve, so I tend to recommend it.

2:27 PM  
Blogger patti_cake said...

Wow I had no idea it would be so much buerocratic BS! I will be sending positive vibes your way. Chin up sweetie!

2:32 PM  
Blogger a fish on a bycicle said...

This might be a ridiculous suggestion, but you have children, you are allowed to employ a nanny? As far as I'm aware there are no rules about how old nannies should be? And once she has a visa to work isn't she is allowed to change employment?

9:36 PM  
Anonymous Gert said...

I suggest you might phone up the IND helpline for specific advice - if you feel anxious you could give a false name, but they have highly trained people sitting waiting to help you and an enquiry shouldn't prejudice any applications, assuming you suggest nothing illegal.

Have you found this link?

If you are strapped for cash it might be helpful in finding free advice - but please only use one that is OISC approved or Law Society registered.

I don't know if there are any Lesbian or Gay organisations that could help. Does Gay Switchboard still exist?

9:27 PM  
Anonymous Gert said...

One further thing. If you want to be Unmarried Partners you need to prove you've been living together for two years (eg if she was a student and you'd met in the flesh and moved in and then her Student LTR ran out).

Or she can enter Britian as a prospective Civil Partner, but you'd have to civil within six months. Or she could enter for student/work reasons and you could establish the Living Together for two years that way, or move to CP in a way that feels natural to you, not for the purpose of Immigration.

Whatever you do, stay legal and don't lie. And take proper advice not that of a blogger.

12:19 AM  
Anonymous Gert said...

Oh, and a visa to work isn't enough, she needs a Work Permit. If she falls into Highly Skilled Migrant she can enter without a job (I'm not sure if IT falls into that, it's for doctors and suchlike). Otherwise the Work Permit needs to be applied for by the employer who needs to demonstrate they were unable to recruit from within UK and EU

12:22 AM  

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